Diary Entry #1--Crazy House

Every day it seems like I'm going crazy. There's just so much to do: wash the dishes, sweep, get the kids ready for bed and school, make dinner...the list is endless.

Tonight Kiara was crying because she didn't want to clean up. Then she was angry and hit Rafael. Then she was crying again, and it's because she loves me so much (her words). Rafael wanted to keep playing outside, then he wanted to play video games, but he kept losing, so he began to cry...then it's bath time, and the bedtime routine, which is sometimes the dreaded time because everyone is tired, emotional, and checked out. I'm living in a crazy house.

Is it my house? My family? Or is this just life? (I definitely think my family is a bit crazier than others generally...)

I keep telling myself that one day it will get easier. Maybe when the kids are older. Maybe when I work less. That doesn't seem to be the truth. Life will always be crazy no matter what.

Do you ever have those days where you know you should spend time with God, yet for some reason you just don't? And then you feel guilty, and then you make excuses, because life gets in the way. Again. I keep getting stuck in that routine, even though I KNOW spending time with God always makes me feel better.

So today will be different. I will make time for my Lord. I will find the time to reset my mind, and meditate on who God is. It is so cathartic. Afterwards I will be renewed...at least for the day. And tomorrow, it will happen again. I need to make it happen again. Even though I am living in a crazy house. At least it's God's crazy house!

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